Tough
by CleverforClever
Summary: Beauty and the Beast kind of story. M for a reason kidies; violence, death, and sex. Freddie is sent away to a military school where he turns into a muderous psychopath. Can the power of Creddie save him, or is he going to take out his rage on the woman he loves? Read and review for updates. I don't own ICarly. Questions?
1. Preview

A.N. This is the story of Freddie and Carly. It is not a happy story. Everyone in it gets hurt. The moral is not a cheerful one to describe. Nevertheless, it is a real story.

Prelude...

Carly Shay was a virgin. Although there were several reasons that she knew, no one else really understood her choice. Spencer was quite happy about this because he knew how boys could be, Sam was... confused. She did not understand why her friend's sex drive was not getting her from 'V' to 100 in twenty seconds. Freddie... he knew though. He understood her, though he could never tell her.

Carly was hot. She had been dancing with Sam for ten minutes now, and thin blotches of sweat turned her white shirt see-through.

The girls panted, out of breath.

"Carly... we have to get better at this if you're going to get yourself a man!"

The brunette shook her hair loose, "Look, I want a boyfriend, but... not this is hard!"

The next song was a rap about how to "get hos to drop low, and suck some mo' til the back of they's throat do' na wo' rk no mo'." The girls began to dance. Sam insisted that their random dancing was not attractive. The sway of their hips matched in perfect time as they got closer and closer, crushing one another's breasts...

"Carls... you're killing it!" Panted Sam.

They finished out the song, and both girls collasped on the bed, "This isn't working!" Pouted Carly.

"It's not a relationship, Carly! What, did you think some datable guy would just walk in?!"

Freddie burst in angrily.

"Freddie doesn't count," Sam sneered and walked out.

"Where have you two been?" He demanded. Carly was looking... ravenous. The boy ignored that and started up again, "Look... I'm not trying to start a fight bu-"

"You were watching," Carly's sultry hiss penetrated his brain. She slinked up to him, "And we did all those naughty things..."

Freddie swallowed, "Listen... I'm not trying to... I mean, I'm your buddy... remember?"

Carly pushed her hand on his chest, toppling him to her bed. It was funny in a way. Freddie was stronger than her now, but she knew how to use her body in a whole new way, "Sam is watching us you know..."

A tongue tickled his ear. Freddie kept his arms at his sides, trying to ignore the situation. Her shirt was hinting at something he very, _very_ much wanted to see.

She straddled him aggressively. He looked on in wonder as she began to grind him. Carly was more experimental than passionate, she wanted to know what this was growing inside her, this passion...!

His hands were pushing up her shirt. She allowed it continuing to feel the smoothness of his hands. She moaned when they found the outside of her cups.

"Freddie, Freddie... Freddie..." Carly hissed his name over and over. She pulled her skirt up very slowly until-

Two surprisingly strong arms stopped her, "Wait."

Freddie got up, his head clear, "I want you, almost more than anything, but I want all of you." She pouted at him, he continued, "I need... more. You're using me, and it feels good, but it isn't enough."

"You can use me too," She whimpered. He kissed her.

"For now, this is enough..."

Running his fingers through her hair, he came away with a ribbon. Freddie decided to keep it as a momento.

He did not know he would not see Carly for the next three months.


	2. Chapter 1

Tough

Freddie Benson was home, **_finally_**. It had been months since he had left for The Seattle Institute of Reformed Boys.

Lying on his bed, he took in its familiar scent and tried to remember the last time he could remember feeling so comfortable.

….

His memory came up blank. Staring around his room, he realized that, though he recognized everything, it was also very alien to him. Yes, his posters for ICarly, Big Time Rush and Galaxy Wars were the same as when he had left at the beginning of the summer semester, but they were foreign to him. He felt… displacement. This was his room, but this was not him anymore.

The Freddie that was had been replaced by The Good Wolf.

He set down his trunk and straightened up. Though he had been taught by his mother to keep his room in order, his militarized mind recognized how pointless it was to have toys. After packing them away carefully, the 'Good Wolf' steeled himself. Life was tough, so he had to be tougher.

At the very end of the winter semester at his old school, Mrs. Benson had caught her son with Carly. Somehow, she knew he was in love. After years of trying to protect her son for all perceived threats, Marissa Benson recognized that Freddie was deeply in love with Carly Shay.

As a mother, this terrified her, so she lashed out.

A huge fight broke out. He was screaming things he did not mean at her, and she was doing the same with him. Heartbroken, she called up The Seattle Institute for Reformed Boys. The people on the phone were very friendly, assuring her that they could fix whatever was wrong with her son. Mrs. Benson hastily agreed to send him away for the summer figuring she would have her little boy back soon enough.

She could not be more wrong.

Yes, the Institute had managed to fix the problem; Freddie no longer displayed any signs of infatuation at all. However he had been militarized; taught to ignore all feeling, and do as he was ordered.

The boy laid his coat, an important possession for any of his fellow students, on the bed. That coat was a life line back at the Institute. He never let it out of his sight. Boys at the Institute were responsible for their coats; they were to be present, cleaned, and in excellent condition. Any discernible inconsistency was dealt with harshly. Demerits were handed out for even a speck of dirt at inspection time. Coats were protection and warmth during midnight drills. And they were badges of honor too. To lose it meant shame and demerits.

And demerits lead to horrible punishments. Freddie shuddered as he remembered his, 'breaking point.' Everyone had it; a mental limit to their toughness, a point when the psyche gives up and breaks down.

_He ran and ran and ran in the midnight rain. The Big Bad Wolf was chasing him. The Big Bad Wolf claimed he was helping, claimed this was the way to get stronger. _

_Freddie neither knew nor cared. He hunched over and lost his lunch, again. The obstacle course was dead tonight. The lights on the field illuminated the ominous hurdles he had to climb over._

_There was only one thing he actually cared about; a single ribbon, clutched in his right hand. The smell of her shampoo was long gone. The color was overridden by mud and blood; but none of that mattered; he still had a piece of her with him. Carly Shay-goddess, idol, the only girl he had ever loved, the only one who meant anything to him anymore._

_The Big Bad Wolf pushed him over. The ribbon started slipping as the wolf pounded his foot into Freddie's side, "Why are you so weak?"_

_He was so angry. The boy went into a fetal position and sobbed. Finally, he was pulled to his knees, "You have to go over these obstacles another ten times before bed. Now, you have to shed whatever it is that's holding you back."  
The ribbon started slipping. Freddie tried to stop it from going, but he was too weak, too exhausted to move his fingers. The cold from the rainwater numbed him._

_"You know Freddie, you have no hate. Of all the dogs I've trained, you're the first one not to contain that emotional weakness; you're like a good wolf."_

Freddie remembered his. But that did not matter anymore. He knew it did not matter anymore because he was stronger now, he was tough.

The people around him would not be pleased. He was no longer the weak-kneed, self-deprecating, good-natured boy that they remembered. No doubt some of them would be disappointed, or angry that he was different now, tough.

This was him. This was who he was now, what he was.

Tough.

Chapter Two: A Party for Freddie

"Sam!" Carly shouted. "Sam!"

Sam begrudgingly trudged down the stairs. Her hair was a mess, and her pajamas were wrinkled, "What?"

Carly shook her head and pushed the blond to the door, "Go get Freddie! It's almost time for his welcome back party."

Sam groaned, "I don't want to go into a deep, dork hole!"

She whined until Carly relented and opted to go get their friend herself. Knocking on the Benson's door, she realized Freddie had not her in months. Absently, the brunette straightened her hair, and brushed down her skirt. The theme of the party was "fairy tales." Carly had decided to go as Little Red Riding Hood. She had decided this partially because she had the hood, but also due to her _not _wanting to be thought of as a princess.

Sam decided to come as a wicked witch, more out of a desire to act inappropriate. No doubt she was preparing pranks. Carly shook her head ruefully. She had heard that Freddie had a hard time at… that place.

No information came in or out of the institute. Throughout the summer break Carly had tried to contact Freddie, or get some kind of idea of what was happening to her friend. But there was just no way to know anything. Mrs. Benson refused to share whatever scant information she had. It had only been a few months, so surely Freddie would want to see his friends, right- right?

Right?

The door to the Benson's apartment was unlocked. Well, that was unusual. Carly entered, but felt a chill run down her spine. The whole place was quiet and dark. The apartment creaked and groaned. She found herself on the stairs before asking herself an important question; if Freddie was home, why was the whole place dark? He was supposed to be home now, but… anyone could be in here. She shivered.

A sound from Freddie's room alarmed Carly. She reached for the door tentatively. It creaked open ever so slowly…

It was dark inside; she thought she may have been imagining it. She shut the door behind her and sat on Freddie's bed. Carly had not been welcome here in some time. The room was emptier than she remembered. Her pictures (Freddie had several) had all been turned down. Moving from the bed back to the door, she wondered aloud, "Freddie, when are you going to come back to me?"

"I'm right here."

Carly jumped and let out a scream.

"Freddie!"

They were feet apart, and she hadn't even realized it.

"Why aren't the lights on?"

He shrugged. They stood in uncomfortable silence.

"So… welcome back!" She rushed forward to hug him, but he threw his hands up in defense. She stopped. "Oh... sorry…"

He shrugged again. She sighed. Why did boys have to be so much trouble? He said nothing at all, just stared. Suddenly she felt very, very uncomfortable.

"Freddie, listen, we're throwing a party for you," She held out a hand slowly this time, "C'mon… it'll be fun."

He looked afraid. Like she would hurt him, "Freddie, please… for me?"

Slowly, ever so slowly, his hand grasped hers. She pulled him towards the door, but felt him stop to get something.

Freddie put his jacket on. He may have returned to the Bushwell Plaza, but he was still the Good Wolf.


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter Three; Ominous

A.N. Read and review for updates. This is a flashback chapter.

The Big Bad Wolf looked over Freddie, critically, "You know you have to stay away from her. She makes you weak."  
The Good Wolf nodded.

"If I catch you with her, you will pay," Another nod. The Big Bad Wolf stepped closer, "And I will do some really, really horrible things too."

Freddie swallowed and backed away. His leader kept it up.

"Do you like the way she smells? Like a berry; soft and sweet, with skin you can just rip apart with your teeth. You know that, though, don't you? Don't you want to just tear into her?" He laughed.

"No, I want nothing to do with her!"

The pack laughed. Mad Dog practically howled, "I'll take me some of that!"

The Big Bad Wolf quelled that thought with a glance, "I think Mad Dogs on the right path here. Maybe he should take Carly into a room; somewhere nice and quiet. Let her give out, again and again and again…"

"She's not like that!"

….

"Then what's she like?"

"Carly won't let anybody that close. She's… special."

Prairie Dog hissed out laughter.

The leader continued, "Well, I'll just have to see about that, won't I?"

He licked his lips, "Carly Shay… that's nice…"  
Chapter Four; Worst Party Ever

The ICarly crew was not getting into the swing of things. Sam delighted in torturing Gibby, but Carly was too busy worrying about Freddie to enjoy the party. She looked at him, too concerned to care that one of her favorite songs was on.

Freddie, for his part, was not too concerned about his party. He was a dog, nothing more, only obedient to his master. And right now, he felt no inclination to 'party.' At the Institute, he had been re-educated. Humans, he was taught were not really monkey-like. Men were like dogs. He was to follow the alpha with loyalty, and the endurance of a canine. He met the Big Bad Wolf and stood up to him, earning Freddie the nickname "Good Wolf."

But no matter how good he was, he could not block _her_ out. Before the let him out of his cage (literally) his masters had instructed him _not to see her or talk to her_. He was directly violating what he was instructed. So if anyone saw him now…

"Jonah, why do you have to be such a party-nub?"  
Sam was starting another fight with her ex-boyfriend. Carly was surprised to see that this was enough to get Freddie to act. He seemed like he didn't care about them anymore, but maybe deep down, he did.

"Jonah, this is my party, time for you to leave," Freddie was surprised by how little inflection he had.

Jonah, brushing Sam off his brown coat, turned to Freddie, "I haven't seen you in a while, and that's not long enough you little bitch."

Freddie's teeth ground in annoyance. He wanted to kill, but knew how to control that urge. If he killed someone the very day he returned… well, that just would not happen. He gestured towards the door.

Jonah nodded and headed out. Then he turned and tackled Freddie to the ground.


	4. Chapter 3

Chapter Five; Awesome Party

Some part of Freddie's mind recognized this party was now officially _awesome_. He and Jonah had crashed through an end-table and bookcase. They wrestled for a moment before a group of drunk teenagers circled them chanting, "fight, fight, fight!"

This party meant nothing to Freddie. A good dog knew better than to show his emotions, yet here he was, fighting some idiot. The two were utterly vicious, slamming their opponent into walls. Within minutes, blood was flying through the air. The crowd backed off. It was one thing to see someone's shirt ripped up, it was another to see Jonah spew enough blood to ruin Spencer's copy of "Nevel Papperman; A Look at Madness."

Freddie's punches were not that powerful, but he just kept swinging away. The two were entirely focused on one another, so much so that anyone who got in the way was simply knocked down. Jonah had never cared about any of these punks, but Freddie used to be on good terms with all of them.

Now he was a wild animal, ripping into his opponent.

Carly had enough. She tried to scream for help, but the noise drowned her out. She called Freddie's name, so used to him answering whenever she did. He was blinded to her presence. The look on his face horrified her. This was not the sweet boy from next door, this was a psychopath.

The fight got to the point where even Sam was disgusted. She watched as Freddie, the dork king of the universe, take a chair to the face and get back up. She knew what was wrong with him; she had seen it countless times on trips to see her family in prison. This girl knew a truth about the world that most people were uncomfortable with; humans are animals. They are smart, successful, occasionally generous, animals. Someone had woken up the beast in Freddie, and the two seemed well acquainted.

Sam tried to keep Carly back, but it was getting hard. The two boys now had a grip on one another. One would punch, and then the other, using the backlash of the punch, would come back and return the force with a punch. The air was filled with the sounds of meat smacking.

Whack, whack, whack, whack, it continued until both were falling to their knees. Freddie charged into a punch and hurtled his opponent through the air.

Once there was a small break from the fighting, (Jonah found himself inside an aquarium) Carly jumped on top of Freddie. He whipped around and pinned her to the floor with a vicious look of rage. Hands on her throat, Freddie growled at the interloper. Heart pounding, breathless, she watched his face go from wild animal to horrified realization, "Carly, I-"

He was cut off as a figure slammed him and Jonah together. The two stumbled dazed as the man took them both down in a single move.

"Get out, both of you," Growled the stranger. He got up and spoke to Carly, "Hi, my name's Griffin."

Chapter Six: An Uncommon Meeting

Carly swept up the remains of the party. Sam was no help (no big surprise there) and Gibby was… well, being Gibby. She sighed.

At least she had made a new friend. A tall, dark, handsome friend who smelled _really_ good and maybe liked her. Well, he liked her enough to stick around after getting blood all over his clothes, which made him take them off. Oh... yeah, they were now good friends. He was buff, to say the least, tall, and very muscular.

He put on some of Spencer's old clothes and went around the apartment straightening the place as he went.  
"So… what kind of girl are you?"

She smiled. They had been getting to know one another really well. He had been really helpful. After Jonah left (practically in need of a body-bag) Freddie had disappeared. The party had sort of gotten out of control for a minute, no one knowing exactly what to do. Griffin had corralled people away from the site of the fight, or rather, managed to knock the debris the two had managed to generate into a corner. He also kept the party from breaking down into a fistfight. That is, of course, until Sam got ahold of Gibby and dared him to punch her in the chest.

And so the rest of the party became about how tough everybody was. Carly was bored. She did not want to hit anyone, nor did she want to be hit. It was then that Griffin lit his shirt on fire and ripped it off.

The evening was a whole lot more interesting after that. She watched for glimpses; he gave them off occasionally when his super-cool leather jacket parted… Carly took a steady breath. Momma liked, momma _really_ liked **that**. But getting to know Griffin was kind of hard. He was quiet, and stared into the distance a lot. Still, maybe she could salvage this evening…

Carly started talking about her life; the absence of her father, the weird life she lead as host of her web show, "Freddie was a great friend, but I was hoping that we would reconnect, you know?" Griffin was getting closer, "And, now that he's back, I don't know exactly what I feel, but I know something isn't right, and that he's holding back, and, boy, is it getting hot in here, or is it just me?"

The hottie kept advancing. He smiled, she laughed nervously, "Relax, I'm not going to do anything."

Carly twittered, "Yeah, 'cause, that's what I was thinking, that you were- or I was- or we were. And man, I sound so stupid right now. Oh…"

Griffin took off his jacket, "I think you're right, it is getting hot in here."

The heat in her cheeks grew, "I- uh, I don't know how to, uh, you know…"

He kissed her. All thought vacated her brain. Oh, Mamma _really_ likes this! She panted as she backed away, "You must think I'm a total nub."

Griffin shook his head, "No, but I do think you need to get out more. Saturday night, at seven, you need to go out with me."

Carly nodded stupidly. Absently she wondered if Freddie was having as good a time, but it did not matter that much to her.


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter Seven: An Unpleasant Meeting

Freddie hit the ground with a thud.

"Get up," The leader growled. It was surprising his leader showed any anger at all. Mad Dog was on the ground beside him, both in tremendous pain, "I said get up!"

Both were hauled to their feet. The Good Wolf steadied himself. It was important to show only loyalty, not weakness.

"You two have only been set on the world for less than a week, and you're already fighting?!"

The leader glared at the boys. Good Wolf tried to speak first, "I didn't start it."

Mad Dog beside him tittered, "Yeah, but you didn't end it, and ending a fight is more important than starting one."

The group was scheduled to meet, but each of the members was late for different reasons. In the corner, keeping silent was Prairie Dog. He was slowly sharpening his knife, "What next?"

The leader sighed. This had been a total disaster, "Alright, it's time for your initiations. Each of you is to cut links with your past-violently. By this time next week, I'll know who you have to kill to get ahead around here. You two have punishment after school. You go first Good Wolf."

Freddie bowed his head in shame. He had known this was coming, but could not hope but feel intense fear for Carly. What if he was ordered to hurt her? Or kill her? At the Institute he had been pounded into believing that his affection was a weakness that interfered with his drive. It was time for him to recognize that and move on. He cupped his fist and nodded his head obediently.

The Good Wolf had to sever any feelings for Carly Shay, and soon.

Chapter Eight: A Beat Down

"Did you see his muscles?" Carly giggled out, for, like, the fourth time.  
"I know," Sam encouraged, "I'm so glad you finally found someone!"

Carly shut her locker door, "Freddie isn't here yet…"

Sam bowered her head in annoyance, "And… that's another reason to hate the little nerd. Dude, you are dating Hot Pants Dance, what does it matter if Freddie isn't here yet? You see me missing any sleep over the little nub?"

Carly let out a sigh of exasperation, "You saw him Saturday night!"

Sam shrugged, "I was bombed, and so was half the party. Alright, so two boys went at it, what else is new?"

"This isn't funny, Sam, I think he was really hurt. Oh, there he is, Freddie! Freddie, over here!" Carly went up on her toes and waved. He walked past. The girl turned to her friend in confusion, "What just happened?"

Sam was surprised too, "I think… the boy just ignored you. Wait, that's impossible. Freddie is incapable of ignoring you."

The two thought for a moment, and they decided that their friend must have brain damage. The day was quite uneventful; Freddie ignored the girls, who, in turn, were too busy in their own world to notice. Still, Carly was worried about Freddie, so she kept a subtle eye on him the whole time.

During lunch, Jonah, Freddie, and a new kid all sat together. Carly was on the edge of her seat with fear, but no punches were thrown. She insisted she and Sam had to sit closer, just in case. The blond scarfed down more food, uncaringly. At the end of lunch, Carly heard Jonah whisper, "You gonna pay, Good Wolf." And he walked away.

Carly could not relax for the rest of the day. She could not tell Principal Franklin, what would he do? And Sam had no interest in dealing with Jonah or Freddie. After the bell rang, Carly followed Freddie. It was hard following him. He was aware she trailing him, but ignored her. Once he got to AV club door, she let out a breath of relief. Her friend was safe… for now.

Moments later the door reopened, and Freddie stepped out. Jonah walked up and dragged him into an empty classroom. Violent sounds resonated from the doorway. Carly peeked in and saw Freddie being beat up. But this time, he was not defending himself.

Blood flew from his mouth, eliciting a sympathetic gasp from Carly. The beating continued. Jonah was merciless, using an open palm to keep from bruising his victim.

"You think you're so hot?"

Smack.

Carly started to tear up. Why wasn't he defending himself, and why couldn't she move? Finally, it ended with Freddie alone on the floor. Silent tears streaming down his face, just like hers.

Jonah put his foot on Freddie and spit on his enemy, "Don't you forget who's in charge!"

Carly ran.


	6. Chapter 5

Chapter Nine: A Night In

Freddie struggled to get home. He was bleeding, and his entire body was sore. To make matters worse, his mother would no doubt want to know how he ended up in such poor shape.

The pain radiating from his legs alternated from left to right.

Left, burning pain, right, stinging pain; burn, sting, burn, sting, burn, and sting. This repetition focused his mind. Tomorrow, Jonah would be punished as well.

In the bareness of his room, Freddie cleaned himself up. His jacket, which had several tears, required some sewing. After finishing that, he forced himself to work out. It was important to keep his body strong.

Half an hour later the boy was out of breath. He went to his computer and logged on to receive an e-mail for the next meeting. No one here but Mad Dog, Big Bad Wolf, and Prairie Dog knew his true intentions. He received the first target and his heart slumped in defeat. The screen went black, shutting his room into total darkness. That was good, the light hurt his eyes. Footsteps came from the hallway.

His mother entered the room, "Freddie, we have to talk. I think that school did something to you. Can't I just get my sweet little boy back?"

"Not really. I have some bad news for you." He advanced on her menacingly.

The next day Carly was voicing her concerns to Sam, "Okay, something wonky is happening at that institute! Jonah went there too, and look at what happened to him! Are you even listening to me?"

Sam was reluctant to answer.  
"Wonky, is that even a word?" Sam turned to her friend, and paused, "Carly… I think you're right. A couple of years ago, my mom tried to send me there."

She stirred her drink absently. Carly had to wait. Sam was… scared?

"That place was scary. It isn't a school, it's a ward. People there want to hurt you. I squirmed out, but… I don't want to talk about it."

Carly nodded and went online. Using the all-powerful internet (thank you Zaplook!) she discovered a prominent psychologist in the Seattle area. She sent him an e-mail requesting to meet with him.

"See Sam, all things are solved using the power of modern technology!" Carly felt a bit cold and shivered, "Now if I could just get ready for my date with Griffin."

The two went on about how hot he was, how sexy he was, and what she should wear the following night, when Spencer came in. He looked upset.

"What's up, Spence?"

"Carly, it's Mrs. Benson… there's been an accident."

Chapter Ten: Murder

The police were all over the apartment. Apparently Mrs. Benson hung herself, leaving an overly-worded suicide note. Freddie was busy answering questions. Although he was beat up, the police took his statement without question, then left.

Only one man was left in the room, "Hello, Mr. Benson, my name is Agent Bob, I have some questions for you…"

He flashed FBI identification and started asking questions. Freddie ignored the inquiries and demanded to know why this was a federal case. He also handed him his card.

"It's funny, most kids would be happy to have an agent looking into their mother's death… but you seem to be fighting me on this. You know what I think?"

"Yeah, I do. You think it's time for you to go, and you're right." Freddie gestured towards the door, "Bye."

The agent left as the door slammed behind him. He spotted a pretty brunette girl and approached her, "Hey, you Fred's girlfriend?"

She blushed, "Oh, we're just friends."

"Right…" He said this in a tone that made it obvious he did not believe her, "Do you think Freddie could kill someone?"

She looked away from his eyes. A week ago, she would have said, "no" but his behavior lately… "No, Freddie would never hurt anybody."

"Right…"


	7. Chapter 6

Chapter Eleven: Alone in the Dark

Freddie huffed to himself. He had killed his own mother. Yeah, she was always nuts, but killing her was intense. His heart beat fast as he chased her, cord in hand. He whipped it around her neck, repulsed by the fear in her eyes, and pulled back abruptly.  
He would never forget the sound of her neck snapping.

Freddie shuddered and sat down. Killing her was not that hard compared to the rest. She had been crazy at him long enough for him to record her going off. A few years ago he began a collection of her insane rants, including lines about how much she wanted to die. That's what the 911 dispatcher heard.

Hanging his mother up was worse than killing her. Their relationship had been ruined anyways, so the murder was a times pleasurable. Hanging her up like some kind of scarecrow was disgusting though. Then having all those people come through….

Freddie was alone, always alone; at the school, during his childhood, always, always alone. He deserved to sit in the dark, he was a freak, a nerd, an outcast. The front door opened, alarming him. Then that smell hit him; fresh fruit shampoo and pinna colada.

Those soft hands found his again, and he felt his mental defenses slipping. Seeing Carly again was… disconcerting. Back at the school, life was simple; get up at five in the morning, get ready for the day, and some free time, inspection at six, breakfast at seven, out to the yard for calisthenics at eight. At twelve, learning began with intensive testing, which ended at five. From there on there would be special training; hand to hand combat, psychological warfare, and tactics.

They were not teaching boys, they were training warriors.

"Are you okay?"  
He most certainly was not, but laying back in her arms made him feel much better. She was so warm, and soft… her skin was like milk chocolate it was so smooth. He sniffed her hair; perfect, absolutely perfect.

Carly Shay was a goddess.

His body craved hers. Freddie resisted the urge. The excitement from killing was messing with his mind. She did not like him like that. Besides, he had _just_ killed someone. Being a killer changes a person. This girl deserved better.

Still, he did not resist the hug.

For her part, Carly finally got to take note of the changes in her friend. His body was leaner now; all the soft parts had melted away, replaced by harder forms of flesh. His face was clear except for the edges, which now displayed innumerable scars. It seemed as though someone had decided to scar Freddie, but do so subtly. Carly felt such pity; no one should have to have been put through all that. And she knew she could not undo it. The urge to kiss him came and passed. Though it was intended to make him feel better, it would probably send him mixed signals.

Instead, the girl promised him, "I will make it all better, Freddie, I promise."

Chapter Twelve: Date Night

A.N. oh, yeah, time for some fan-service!

Carly showered slowly, lathering her body with soap. She never took a bath anymore. Humming to herself, she put shampoo in her hair before getting more soap. Spencer, ever the uncommon thinker, had put a liquid soap dispenser on the showerhead. The person in need simply had to tap a button and the soap would be delivered directly to the body.

Carly preferred her way. She took a bar of sweet soap in with her, preferring its scent to Spencer's concoction. The girl prepared herself for another run.

This was her time to reflect. This last week had been horrible. Freddie had returned home, which should have been the highlight of her summer. Instead she found herself worrying about him more than ever.

She thought about what Sam had said about the place. How they messed with the kids were. Freddie was hard now, unapproachable. He stayed in his apartment without talking to anyone. The more she thought about him, the more worked up she got.

Then of course, there was Griffin. She felt nervous for her date. What if he thought she was a total spaz? What if something went wrong? The more she thought about _that_ the more would up she got as well. There was so much riding on this. He was really smart, and cute and sensitive… well; he was hot, which was enough for most girls. And his kisses… oh, mama, it sent chills down her spine to think about 'em.

It was like sticking a Popsicle into her womanhood in the summer heat, it was that amazing.

The stress was getting to her. Freddie's emotional issues, Griffin's hotness, Sam's abhorrence of Freddie and of course she had school, getting ICarly back online, etc.

It was time to relieve some pressure.

She peeked her head out of the shower to make sure the bathroom was empty and the door was locked.

After confirming what she already knew, Carly Shay withdrew into her mind. This was something that, of all the people she knew, actually came from Nevel. He told her how amazing it was to be him, how his whole world came down to nothing more than what he wanted and how he wanted it.

Of course, she did _not_ want to think about Nevel for this next part. Grasping the shower controls, she turned the head from 'stream' to 'pulse'. Swallowing guiltily, Carly shut out the whole world and let her mind wander on its own. Building a mental castle was the first step; the door, the walls, the floor and the ceiling were her whole world. Once she no longer thought about the fact that Spencer may hear the difference in the water pressure, come running in here and accuse her of defiling her body, Carly continued in her imagination.

She closed her eyes and went to a place of comfort; a waterfall she had wandered onto during a camping trip. It was so beautiful she had to swim in it. Her hands roamed her body. Shifting from one place to another, the girl decided what she liked.

Her left hand was needed on her shoulder, where the water present pulsed into her neck. Her other hand rubbed across the opposite of her belly. They spent some time roaming the innocent parts of her; relaxing the tensed muscles.

Right now, her whole world consisted of nothing more than her body.

It sounds gross, or weird, maybe even egotistical to say that, but she needed this time to get her priorities straight. By the end of her time in the shower, Carly would be ready to take on her problems.

Eventually, her arms and legs had been touched thoroughly enough. She had turned around and let the warmth cascade down her back. A stubborn rivulet of water poured from the sensitive inside of her neck down her chest. Carly shivered, readily.

Her left hand followed the water, gently pushing it where it was needed, of her breasts. She sighed as she- whoa… a groan escaped her. Her right hand was brought up from its spot on her belly button to between her mounds.

Carly had always enjoyed how perfect her body was, though tried not to let it go too far. Her arms crossed, and she massaged until she was content.

Boys were dumb. They always took without taking the time to make sure girls left with something. Once that area had received enough attention, Carly found herself as fully turned on as she could be.

This next part she had to figure out on her own; take your time.

Boys were _very _dumb. They charged in and took as much as they could only to want more in a few minutes time. Carly knew how to strive. She built the pressure up inside herself before trying to relieve it.

She turned up the power. The blasts of water pounded on her back. The girl spun around, letting the liquid hit her sensitive chest while both her hands went lower.

This was the hardest part for her. It did not seem very lady-like. This time it was Spencer's advice that helped her, 'know what you want.' He said that a lot. Carly knew what she wanted and how she wanted it.

Her imagination kicked into gear, sending her to that waterfall in northern California. Fresh air and fresh water bombarded her senses. The fingertips of her right hand grazed her sensitive flesh. Carly stepped back in surprise. She had no idea how her life had gotten so stressful so quickly.

Taking control again, the teenager went back into her mind and asked what she wanted; strawberries were the answer. She inhaled and imagined wild strawberries growing on the banks. Full, lush strawberries that weighed down the stems exploded into existence. They were plump, more than ready for the picking. Their sweet juices were practically running out.

Carly went deeper; what did she really want? Kisses like Popsicles, that's what she wanted. She allowed her fingers to tease her flesh. Moments passed, and then, as she expected, Griffin came to mind. He had to bare his chest, and those awesome scars came into view. The irregularity of them had teased her fingers.

He kissed her.

In reality, Carly's lips were moving. The showerhead was now pumping on her stomach above her navel. All the doubts and cares that weighed her down were suddenly gone as he put his hand on her waist. The nude girl leaned back, almost contented. Hands snaked around her ribs, pushing her breasts up. She groaned. That was nice. The sensation was almost real as she leaned back.

At once, she felt both excited and safe, like skydiving off a chair. Those hands, so soft, wound their way up as lips found that spot on the back of her neck. Oh yes, Freddie's spot. He had discovered it by accident while they were editing one night. His hands had snaked up to loosen some errant curls (honestly, his lie for putting his arm around her was that weak) when she let out a gasp.

The two had exchanged a look and he withdrew his hand, both of them red in the face.

In the shower, Carly was divided by her lovers. Both Griffin and Freddie were giving her attention. When she would turn to Freddie, and the delicious warmth of water hit her back, all those cares she had both holding onto evaporated, whereas her time with Griffin was hot. The blasts of water hit her more sensitive areas over and over and over and over.

Finally, finally, she decided to finish.

_Almost there, Freddie, harder…._

_On the left, the left, and the right, that's_

_Nice_

_Oh, Griffin lower…. Go lower… yes._

_Freddie, harder….._

_More, now-!_

_IN!_

Carly screamed. Spencer must have heard that. The entire complex must have! She panted.

Her life was just so rough right now.

A.N. You don't have to read and review this chapter, because honestly;

1) I am not that good at this stuff.

2) It is difficult to comment on this kind of thing.

3) I am shamelessly exploiting this character for my own agenda.

4) I barely did any plot in here.


	8. Chapter 7

Chapter Thirteen: Date Night

"Hey Spencer!" Carly was drying her hair when she came to see her older brother.

"What's up kiddo?"

The artist was sitting on their couch, patiently waiting for her to join him. The Shays sat in silence for a moment, considering what they were about to talk about.

She smiled. Her brother was always so nice, and he made sure she was okay. They always had a talk before she went out with someone. Carly had already told him all about Griffin, so this was more about standard protocol than it was some forced conversation.

"I should be back by ten tonight," She sighed as he tried to glare, "C'mon, I really like this guy! You always let me out later before!"  
He nodded, agreeing, "Yes, because those were sweet guys, and Sam could put the hurt on them. What do you know about this Griffin guy? He could be a serial rapist!"

His sister rolled her eyes, "Now you're being ridiculous."

They sat together comfortably for a minute, then something that had been bugging her for a while came to mind. She thought about ignoring it, but realized that Spencer was here for this kind of stuff.

"Spencer, what if, like, a girl… likes two guys at the same time?"  
He laughed, "That kind of makes her a slut, right?"  
The awkwardness filled the air.

"Uh, I mean, why do you ask?"

She looked down, "I'm not so sure what I want right now."

The girl went into a rant that is so all-encompassing that to write it down would take a very, very long time. (I'm lazy, so what?)

Basically; she wants Griffin, but she also feels something for Freddie.

Spencer listened patiently for his turn. Finally, he spoke, "Ideally, the boys should respect you enough to give you time to sort out your feelings. But let's be honest here; that's not what's going to happen. Talk to Griffin tonight and think about whether or not you really want him. Maybe you want Freddie, or maybe this is just a product of your concern for him. I was once stuck making art only about cows because I ran out of milk. That does not make my muse a bovine! Just… think about what you want, and come to a decision when you're ready."  
The smile on her face told him he did well. She hugged him, "I think I'll be ready soon enough!"

He patted her back reassuringly, but inside he was terrified for her. This Griffin guy felt like bad news to him.

"I've got to go get ready. Sam'll be over later so we can talk about what happened, or didn't happen tonight!"  
She darted up the stairs while he freaked out, "Whoa! Let's keep a lot _not_ happening things happening! Or something, I've not really thought this through, but less is more Carly! Carly?!"

Carly giggled to herself. Spencer was already beside himself with worry. Of course, there was no way that he could intimidate Griffin. Her boyfriend was too big, and tough, and hot! She went to her drawer to pick out her clothes.

This afternoon, she had been wearing humorous underwear, a bra that read 'left' and 'right' which was part of a combo with a pair of panties that read the same thing on the buns. It was funny to her, but definitely not the kind of material she wanted to wear out.

Carly was not sure what exactly she wanted.

She knew what Sam would say, "Yo, don't wear nothing! If ya don't, you can't make a mistake! 'Sides, it's what I would do!"

Not the correct choice in any universe. Spencer would probably want her to wear one of his gag gifts, but she had already vetoed that idea.

Then there was Freddie. It was like a horrible love triangle, where two boys were fighting over her in her head. She imagined him, standing behind her. Just for fun, the brunette loosened the robe, letting it fell sensually around her. His opinion would help her. If he was here, he would select… this red pair. They were silk: sexy and comfortable, yet not at all slutty. Perfect.

She put them on, and then spent the next three hours going through her closet. Her final outfit was perfect; dark jeans black lines streaking down the sides, a black shirt and deep purple jacket. High heels gave a necessary height booster for kissing, and knee-socks. It was not her most alluring outfit, but it was passable for a first date. She did not want to come on too strong.

In the hallway she ran into Freddie, "Hey stranger!" She called to him brightly.

He looked at her, a hint of a smile on his lips, "Carly, good to see you again."

Relief flooded her. Somehow, after everything that had happened, Freddie, _her_ Freddie, was still in there. And if she knew her Freddie…. He was relaxed as her arms encircled his body. She melted into him. This time, for her reassurance not his.  
There was not enough time for them to catch up. So she hugged him and told him to come back around.

Neither of them mentioned her date.

She was upset to find Spencer and Griffin glaring at each other, "Let's get something straight, you piece of trash, my sister deserves much, much better than you, as a matter of fact, you don't deserve to even talk to her, but she's made her choice. And I respect that. So for now, I'm not going to interfere, but the second, the millisecond that I hear you mistreating her, I will pull the plug on you. I may be a nice guy," He paused here, and let his voice drop without emotion, "But you ought to know something; nice guys are much, much tougher than bad boys because we know what we fight for."  
Griffin was staring silently with his arms crossed. Spencer mimicked his opponent.

Carly sighed, tromped down the stairs, and took off with her date.

Chapter Fourteen: A Silent Presence

Carly laughed wildly as she tumbled into a chair. She could not remember the last time she had this much fun. Well, okay, she _had_ dated a lot of boys while Freddie was gone, but for some reason, each and every one of them fell short in her eyes.

She had been called everything from picky to downright stuck-up, but the truth is, she was not sure what she wanted, and so she just kept looking in all the wrong places.

Griffin was grinning, yet clearly not as wildly joyous as his date.

"What's wrong, tough guy?" She poked him in the stomach, "Afraid of smiling?"  
He chuckled and started poking her in the stomach too. She laughed again and tried to squirm away. He caught her with one arm and pulled her body closer to his, "I have you now!"

"No!" She squealed with joy. He positioned her and came in for a kiss.

Wow, just wow… she melted with it. The date so far had been pretty good. He picked her up on a motorcycle and drove her to a restaurant. They had some food and he decided to dance. Carly's moves were a bit outdated, so she decided to learn on the fly. She and Sam had done a bit of practicing when they became teenagers.

A new song came on; one the girl was familiar with. The singer was a female declaring her intense mating rituals for public enjoyment. Carly pulled her date to the floor and began.

**_She and Sam were dancing like little girls. But fell on the floor laughing. _**

**_"Oh Sam, I love dancing with you!"_**

**_"Me too, but don't you think we're getting a little old to dance like this?"_**

Back on the date, Carly began. The intro had finished and the singer started by describing, 'her boy' an intense lover whose focus was to have sex with her continuously. Carly let her hands drift over Griffin a bit. When the date began, he was surprisingly physically introverted to her touch. Of course, he had plenty of scars from fights, but this was his girlfriend. Why draw back from her?

**_Sam helped her friend back to her feet, "C'mon, if we want boys, we have to learn how to dance the right way; like whores."_**

**_Carly shook her head, "C'mon, dancing is for fun!"_**

**_"If a boy danced like that with you, you'd break up with him."_**

**_The brunette nodded, "Fine, what do you want to do?"_**

**_A hand smacked an answer into her behind, "Learn how to dry hump without it being too obvious."_**

The beat picked up and Carly went to work with her hips. As unattractive as it was to admit, this sort of thing was hard to do. She was glad that she had practiced with Sam.

Griffin was already enjoying the show. He pulsed to the beat, watching her every move. She came in close, grinding against him like a stripper.

**_"Carly, watch me," Sam put her arm on Carly's neck and spread her legs. Her hips started to grind into her friends, and she threw her hair back. Both girls started gyrating to the beat, more feeling what they were supposed to be doing than thinking about it._**

Carly was pressed against her date. She was already red from exertion and embarrassment, but she was sexy. Her breasts skimmed his chest, leaving her sensitive. His hands combed through her hair pushing her head back to kiss. She felt uneasy, remembering the time Freddie had done the same thing.

**_"Sam!" Carly leapt back as her mouth had collided with Sam's._**

**_"Carly, if we're going to dance like a couple of sluts, we've got to be prepared for when they kiss us! Now come here!"_**

**_"Ooof! Okay, fine, bossy pants," The ground into one another to the beat. Sam licked her lips and came in again. Now prepared, the girls kissed each other, mixing tastes._**

Griffin reaped the rewards of her work. Her lips made their way up his neck, into his cheek, then onto his lips. He pressed into her with renewed vigor, practically melding with her. Explosions of heat made her feel like she was cooking from the inside out. His hands made their way to the seat of her jeans. Carly did not know for sure what he was doing, but relaxed into it. The hands cupped her buttocks, pulling her ever closer.

**_Sam's breasts rubbed against Carly's quickly. The two were lost for a moment, grinding against one another sensually. In the back of her mind, they both knew Freddie was waiting outside of the door, but that made it so much better…_**

A firm squeezed brought her gasping back to reality. The song was over, and for some reason, that brought her some relief. He led her over to a corner and pressed her against the wall. It was dark here, secluded. The two made out for some time before she broke it off, breathless.

"You smell so good!" She sounded like a total spaz.

He laughed at her lack of stamina, "Virgins."

She paled and looked at him. He explained, "Your underwear drawer… it was open at the party."

Carly blushed bright red as he listed his evidence, "Pink, and with ruffles? Definitely a virgin."

Her entire face was red. His hands moved against her, "Let me see…"

She looked around, doubtfully, "See what?"

He snapped her belt open.

"Griffin no!" She scrambled to shut it, but he held her wrists.

"Let me see," There was no room for argument in his voice. He was adament, and was far stronger then his date. She relaxed her hands. The pop of her button sounded deafening to her. Everyone in the restaurant had to know what they were doing, "Carly, show me."

She blushed, but obeyed, unzipping slowly. They opened the lips of the jeans together. Griffin's breathing was as regular as ever, but Carly was hyperventilating. She almost died when he saw her panties were red silk. He was so right about her; she was a virgin. The red silk flashed alluring in the light, like a flag ready to be captured. Her boyfriend removed his hands, but she did not close up yet. What did she want? The girl was unsure. On the one hand, she had managed not to go that far with anyone yet, on the other, what exactly was she waiting for?

Carly remembered Spencer, and thought about what he would say. Her brother was right; she did not know for sure this was what she wanted. After promising to call her tomorrow, Griffin closed her pants tightly, teasing her flesh. They made out for a bit more. His hands found their way to her bottom again.

"Hey, I've got to get home," She whispered. He nodded, trailing his fingers across the right pocket of her jeans.

"I know… but this isn't over yet," He pushed a finger inside the pocket and pushed in slowly, "Not by a long shot…"

(Back at the Bushwell Plaza)

"Freddie, are you here?" Spencer opened the door to the Benson's. It was never locked these days. Then again, there was no reason to lock up. All the furniture had been sold off. The food was military rations, and the bathroom had minimal toiletries.

The artist took to the stairs, two by two. He hoped that spending some time with the boy would help bring him back out of the shell he had created for himself. The boy's room was more bare than he had anticipated. Two violent looking swords hung on the wall. He tested the sharpness of the blades and drew away a bloody finger.

Freddie's computer was open. Spencer sat down, knowing he was violating his friend's privacy, but not caring. He found a file marked, 'future plans.'

"What a dumb name to disguise porn," Spencer selected it.

The voice that came over the speakers was female, but it was definitely _not _porn- well, mostly because Mrs. Benson did not qualify. Hours of vocals were in here. Spencer's mind raced until it came to an unsettling conclusion; maybe Marissa Benson's suicide was indeed a homicide. His bloody fingerprint withdrew from the mouse stickily. He backed away and left the apartment, mind racing.


	9. Chapter 8

Chapter Fifteen: Fire

After a relaxing make out session in the building's garage, Carly made her way upstairs. In the elevator, she ran into Freddie. He had to be following her again. It riled her to think he was being possessive again. How many times had she told him they were only friends? She was happy with Griffin, and her moody 'friend' was still acting all love-struck!

"Carly, wait…" He grabbed her arm.

She shoved him away, "I don't want to hear it! Shove off!" He hit his door with a thud. She cringed since she had not intended to shove him _that_ hard, "Freddie, I-" He went in and slammed the door behind him.

Great, back to square one with him. Next time they saw each other Freddie would be back to Sir Sulks Inthedark

Carly arrived home to find Spencer waiting for her, "Carly hi! You've got a message from that psychology professor dude!"

Carly read the e-mail. He wanted to see her next week Monday. She agreed to meet him at a public park. Sam met Carly in her room.

"Hey, how'd it go?"

Not a detail was spared. Sam was impressed that her friend had opened up so much, "So… is this the uh… guy to do the deal? The one to, you know," She made a thrusting motion, "Lancelot your maiden?"

Carly paled and blushed at the same time. She sighed, and then told Sam about her run-in with Freddie, "Are you going to tell me that's okay? He might have been following me all night!"

Her friend surprised her, "Carly, we've been friends for a long time now. Heck, I know you better than anyone. For once though, I'm going to side with Freddie. Yes, he is a total stalker, but… we don't know what he was going to say. What if he wanted to open up?"

They both discussed all the possible alternatives the night could have taken. Sam decided to stay over.

A week later, Carly still was not talking to Freddie. He had disappeared almost completely. She still went to see Doctor Hammond about what he knew about the Institute.

The park was a clear green, absolutely fresh. Carly seated herself and waited for the man to show himself. While waiting, a golden retriever came bounding up. He was a happy dog, rolling amicably. His right eye was murky, obviously blind, so the girl avoided touching him on that side.

"You're smart for an American girl," Doctor Hammond motioned and the dog went to his side, "I am Doctor Hammond, how can I help you?"

Carly explained her situation with Freddie, "I can't help but think I have no clue what's going on in his head!"

The doctor laughed at her while petting his dog. He took a moment to explain, "My grandfather was a Soviet scientist trying to create ultimate human during the Cold War. They had tried breeding programs, but nothing panned out. An athlete and a rocket scientist having regular children killed the work. Still, as time moved on, my grandfather had a spectacular idea. He took the lowest of the crop; losers, ignorant weaklings, and he pitted them against one another mercilessly," He stared off coldly. Carly's father got the same look when talking about war zones.

"What happened?"

"The weak ones got stronger. 'It is not the size of the dog in the fight, but the size of the fight in the dog.' This is the theme that the Institute uses. Right now, they are training a private army of soldiers. Your friend is part of this army," The dog rested at his feet.

"Is he going to be okay?"  
The doctor shook his head, "Freddie is like a fighting dog. They cage them and beat them, all in an attempt to make them meaner. Well, it also makes them unstable. But with a little love…" The dog rolled on its back to have its stomach scratched, "My father did not understand love. But it is important. Take Fido here. He was abused, but with love and attention, he is very friendly. Freddie is the same way. He needs someone to take the fight out of him."

The problem was that Carly had no idea how to do that.

...

Carly arrived home to find Spencer in a suit, "Who died?" She asked jokingly.

"Mrs. Benson, didn't Freddie tell you the funeral was today?" He looked at her quizzically. His sister's head thumped stupidly on the counter. That was probably what he was trying to tell her the other night. She felt so stupid.

Her phone rang. It was Griffin. Wow… this was horrible timing. She sighed and text him explaining she would be busy tonight.

Carly got ready for the funeral. She slipped into a black dress with short heels. Her hair hung low. Looking at herself in a mirror, the girl decided that tonight she would just be there for Freddie however she could.

The Shays arrived late. Freddie was already done with his eulogy and already shaking hands. His face was dead. No emotion at all was shown. The crowd thinned out. Griffin stood in a corner with Jonah. Freddie was handed an urn, and he set it down.

Carly waited until he was alone before talking to him. She stood behind him waiting. He had not turned yet. Carly stood quietly at his back, waiting for what she knew had to be coming. As if on cue, he stood straight and stiffened. His nose took note of her scent. Freddie inhaled deeply, taking comfort in the fruit and pina colada smell.

She stepped up behindo him and put a hand on his shoulder. Freddie shoved her aside and left. He was the Good Wolf now. He had business to attend to.

Chapter Sixteen: Fire

Carly woke to the smell of smoke. She bolted awake coughing.

Crawling from her bed, the girl made her way down the hallway to the stairs. From there she made her way to the hallway. The air was clogged making it difficult to breath. Panting, the girl made her way to the stairs to see the bottom floor in flames, "Oh no…!"

There was no escape. A firm hand grabbed her and hauled her to the elevator, "Griffin?"

The door slid open and the two dropped down the shaft. Carly grunted as her rescuer snagged the ropes. Carly gasped as she recognized her rescuer, "Freddie?!"

Freddie was grunting with effort climbing down. His friend held onto him breathlessly. Finally, he made his way to another floor where they could get out. The fire department showed up with an ambulance.

"Oh no… Spencer…"

Carly had to sit around answering questions. Freddie had disappeared as quickly as he had appeared.

She was told that Spencer had been seriously hurt during the blaze. He had been taken to a nearby hospital. Though in critical condition, his chances for recovery were good. The police explained that some faulty wiring from his motorcycle plus some old materials from his work were at fault. They asked if he had been working on it lately. She answered them ignorantly; no one had touched it but Spencer as far as she knew.

Finally Agent Bob got to ask her some questions. After giving her his card, he began talking about her relationship with Freddie. He seemed to be sure that Spencer's accident was arson. He was also curious as to whether or not she knew what Freddie had been up to, "Listen to me; I've been investigating this school for years. They are mass-producing terrorist cells for hire. Three kids in a cell, plus the leader. Freddie is one, as is his new friend Jonah. I'm putting pressure on the third."

Carly wondered what constituted 'pressure' under the FBI's jurisdiction. Bob continued, "The Dean is in town, and I'm hoping he'll slip up. I'll bust him and prove that this whole thing is a conspiracy. Keep an eye on Freddie."

With that, he left. Once all the government personnel had filed out, someone returned to her.

"Hey Carly," Freddie stood in the doorway nervously. He shifted, as if afraid she may hurt him, "Do you need someplace to stay tonight?"

Whether because of Agent Bob, or Spencer, or some desire to get closer to her friend, the girl agreed. She crept into the apartment, afraid of brushing up the darkness that had touched her friend so.

Freddie had brought her bed in. It was fit for a princess, "Thanks." He nodded and turned to leave, "Wait!" She was scared of what was happening, "Could you… I mean, I don't want to be alone…"

He nodded, unsure. Carly swept back the cover and cuddled in. Freddie knelt by her feet, watching her, "I'll be here while you rest, and make sure you are safe until you wake up." He said this with a calm ferocity.

She knew her friend would keep his word. Some part of Carly, a very naught part, wanted to take him underneath the sheets, wanted him to stay vigilant to her all night in an entirely different way, wanted very much to have this man end her virgin curse. But… it would be cheating. Griffin was not lying to her, was not using her, so why would she do that to him?  
This only confused her more. Her life had become too complicated too quickly.

Slowly, like an ember burning out, Carly shay went to sleep.

The girl dreamt of fire, and of a shadowy figure coming to her. He was burning up himself, but he was saving her. Carly could not tell whether it was Griffin or Freddie.

A.N. No more updates 'til I get a review. No, it's not fair, but, c'mon, I would like to hear where you think this is going.


	10. Chapter 9

Chapter Seventeen: Dark Alleys

The Big Bad Wolf turned to Prairie Dog.

"You betrayed me, you betrayed us."  
"No, please, I'm begging you, I didn't tell Agent Bob anything!"

The Good Wolf looked down with pity. His friend, no, his schoolmate, was bleeding heavily. Even back at the Institute this amount damage was considered excessive. It was so painful that even Prairie Dog's training to ignore pain was not enough. The puddle of red liquid underneath the youth just kept growing and growing.

The Big Bad Wolf sniffed the air, "This agent, Bob, does he know the plan?"

Prairie Dog gasped, "No, I swear, I didn't tell him! Why would I? It's not like he'd believe me!"

Good Wolf stepped in, "We don't even know the plan! My- I mean," he stopped himself before saying, 'my mom', which would have betrayed his emotional weakness, "My target is dead. I killed her. Mad Dog here has yet to take his." Mad Dog snarled. His prey was stronger than she looked. Besides, it was a personal vendetta, "What is our goal?"

The Big Bad Wolf smiled, "You'll see… In the meantime, Mad Dog, you're on."

Mad Dog hopped to as Sam Puckett strolled up, "Oh, it's Nubs R Us!" She absently noticed the crazed look in Mad Dog's eyes, "And Jonah, if you keep looking like that, your eyes will pop out!"

Jonah growled and lunged forward. The two wrestled for a moment, but there was no doubt in Freddie's mind who would win. In a few seconds, the guy was flying through the air. Sam panted with exertion, "C'mon… it's harder to eat my breakfast!"

Freddie actually laughed, "I know Sam."  
He stepped out. The blond made a joke about how he was so skinny; she did not see him 'til now.

"Well, I'm a little bigger than the last time we fought," He circled her, "What else have you noticed?" She made a comment about why he and Jonah were in the dark together.

"I guess you two are stuck trying to come out of the closet at the same time," She tensed, ready to strike. Freddie relaxed. A smooth punch knocked him in the shoulder. The boy leaned back, then forward, ready again.

"C'mon Sam, harder," He egged her on.

"Isn't that what you asked from Jonah?" She thought he would flinch into the path of her last punch. But given the fact that he did not move and was unfazed at its impact, the blond recalculated just how tough Freddie was.

"Better, Sam, but where're the comment about Carly and me?"

Big Bad Wolf shifted angrily. There wasn't supposed to be a 'Creddie' anymore. The girl was distracted, allowing her friend to land one on her stomach.

"Take it, stupid slut, just like you do for anybody with a pulse!"

She lashed back, but her heart was not in it. Indescisen was holder her back. Did she really want to hurt Freddie? Did he really deserve all the comments she had made over the years? Was he right? Did she really go for anybody?

"I- am not- a slut!"

Her words came with fists. Freddie had learned a long time ago how to take a punch. He took this moment to thank her for toughening him up, "I know Sam." She paused. He went on, "I know it was you. You told my mom. I don't know why; loyalty to Carly, annoyance at me for not seeing you for what you are." She tackled him. He rolled her over and off, "I know you do care for me! But I do know that you're a scared little girl with no daddy, no real momma, and nothing to live for. And when you see Carly happy, you know she has what you never will!"

Sam's blows became uncoordinated. Her focus was off as her emotions set in. Prairie Dog watched with interest; The Good Wolf was killing her from the inside out. Using psychological warfare, he cut into her heart, seeding it with doubt. Though a strong girl, Sam was not unbeatable. The power of her strength came from her knowledge of her desires. Sam, unlike Carly, always knew what she wanted and how she wanted it. Putting that kind of drive into a girl gave her strength. Made her determined.

Right now, Sam did not know what she wanted. Although Freddie was her friend, he was hurting her, and though he was doing that, he letting her hurt him. Who really ought to win this? Did Freddie hate her because she loved him? The confusion weakened her until she did not know why she was fighting at all.

Jonah came in, adding to the confusion; was he really the bad guy, or was she so sick she made a good boy go crazy? He lashed at her violently. The girl tried to fight back, but her strength was ebbing away. Freddie had stolen it.

Her friend sat in the corner, sore and bleeding. The Big Bad Wolf hovered over him. The leader commended the boy and sent him home. Prairie Dog asked what the plan was. To answer, Big Bad Wolf and Mad Dog smiled.

It was going to be a rough night for Samantha Puckett.

Chapter Eighteen: A Day in the Sun

"Hasn't it occurred to you yet that people who get between you and Freddie end up hurt?"

Carly lay down on the blanket. Her bright yellow sundress was perfect for the early fair weather. For once, Seattle was not overcast at the end of January. (A.N. the beginning of this takes place at the beginning of the school semester. Cut me some slack if it's off.)

Agent Bob was keeping an eye on her. He was speaking to her via earpiece, "And remind me again why we're having this picnic?"

She sighed at him, "Look this doctor guy told me I had a shot at helping him. So… this is what I give him. Sunshine, warmth, someone to rely on." She petted her dress. Some research revealed that using sex as a tool was a huge no-no.

Typically in this sort of situation Carly could show a bit of body to get what she wanted. According to the books and the online summaries she read, provoking a sexual response in an unstable male was a very, very bad idea. So she decided to keep things light.

Sam had been gone for a few days now. Normally, Carly would not be worried, but given the way that people in her life were dropping like flies, she decided to try and ignore the sinking feeling in her stomach.

Freddie appeared. He was wearing the same jacket as always, but his expression was different. The boy seemed totally at peace. Carly wondered about him. If he had killed his mother, why was he now so calm? If he had set Spencer on fire, why would he agree to eat with her?

The two ate together in relative silence, enjoying the quiet. Neither could say much; Carly due to the fact that her life had been completely flipped upside-down and Freddie because he had flipped her life. Finally, he checked his e-mail on his pear phone.

"I have to go," He whispered.

"Carly," Agent Bob muttered, "You have to keep him here. The Institute is going to use your friend to kill someone important. We need to find out who it is, stop him, and take down the Institute once and for all, do you understand?"

"Freddie wait!" She ignored the fear building in her stomach and foolishly grabbed him. He lashed back with unbridled fury. The two stared at each other, now aware of the gaping hole in their friendship.

Carly lied to herself; Freddie would never hurt her; the red mark on her face was from something else. Freddie hated himself, loathed Fredward Benson to the very core of his being, throughout every fiber everywhere.

"I love you so much." They both said it inside, but were afraid to say it out loud. The boy turned and left. He wondered in his heart if there was any way he could ever return to her. He hurt the girl he loved. Little Freddie, the one that went to a real school and had cool friends, was crying inside. But the Good Wolf said that they had someone to kill, and the wolf knew how to survive without love. Once Freddie was gone, Agent Bob rushed in.

"Great! Now we don't know anything at all! How am I supposed to stop him now!?"

Carly rounded angrily on the agent. She had been confused up until now, but suddenly things were becoming clear, "Listen, the only reason we're doing this is to help him!"

He smacked her. She hit the ground with surprising force. The girl came around again, "Let me ask you a question; what do you think is going to happen to you when Freddie finds out you hit me?" He paled. Carly pushed on, angry that it took her so long to defend her friend, "I don't know what he has or has not done; but I know what those boys are capable of!"

"You know nothing!"

She laughed, "I know a guy. He told me everything! And by the way, Dr. Hammond has been right about everything so far, so I if I were you, I'd start running."

The silence clicked, "Dr. Hammond is in Washington?"

Carly sighed, "Yeah, I met him on this site. He said he knew what was going on inside the school."

Agent Bob started advancing on her, "Let me get this straight; a girl connected to two psychopaths finds the world's expert in training and reversing the effects of militarizing male children, and you don't think to mention it?!"

Her mind clicked, "That's their target! They're going after Hammond!"

Agent Bob took off. This was the break he was looking for. With this proof, he could finally shut down the Institute once and for all.

Too bad it was a trap.

A.N. Dun dun duuuuun...! Thanks for the reviews!


	11. Chapter 10

Chapter Nineteen: Safe and Sound

Carly rode home on the back of Griffin's bike. She melded into him comfortably. Agent Bob was going to stop Freddie. Although her friend had training, he was not a professional. Still, she could hope.

"Carly, there's someone I need you to meet," Griffin brought her to his apartment and introduced her to Agent Kennedy, Bob's partner.

For the next hour, Agent Kennedy asked her an intense series of questions. Griffin was there for support, but the way the agent bore into her mentally was draining. Finally, Griffin stepped in, "I'm sure you have a limited amount of time, right?"  
"Of course, you're right. One more thing Miss Shay, I wanted to ask you; who is reporting all this information to Agent Bob?"  
She answered, glad the interview was over. Agent Kennedy left. Griffin kissed her head and told her she had done well. Carly went to his bathroom to freshen up.

She dialed Agent Bob's number, "Hey, I just spoke with your partner. He didn't seem to know much."  
"Partner? What're you talking about? I've been labeled a madman! I don't have a partner."

A chill ran up her spine, "I don't understand, Agent Kennedy…"

There was a pause, "What did he look like?"

"Tall, dark hair, a little shorter than Griffin with a scar across his cheek, and he was wearing a duster."

A gasp came over the line, "That's… the head of the Institute! Carly, they must've- ah!"

Three pops came over the phone. Carly hung up, and felt her confusion clear up. She looked out at Griffin, "hey… I'm just going to leave now… okay?"

He stepped in front of the door, "Dr. Hammond works with us, you know…"  
Her head bowed, "So what are you?"  
His teeth grinned ominously, "I'm the Big Bad Wolf."

Chapter Twenty: Putting the Pieces into Place

Griffin pushed her onto the bed. Carly had figured out plenty, but obviously not enough.

He had been at the Institute for years, and had personally trained Freddie. He was here to keep an eye on the new recruits, as well as prove their worth with a difficult target; an FBI officer.

Spencer had invited him over as a peace offering, but Griffin figured the artist had to be taken out of the way, "Take off the dress, Carly."

She shook her head, so he ripped it open from the hem to her waist, "I had to control you, make sure you weren't capable of turning Freddie around on us. He's dead now. I sent him against Prairie Dog, and the two probably killed one another. And Sam? I thought she might be able to identify me back when she visited." He stroked Carly's thigh, "Let's just say we had a very intimate encounter. Now, you've had your fun teasing me, it's time to put out. Kneel down."

She shook her head. That was a mistake. Grabbing the girl by her hair, Griffin lifted her, and slammed her face-first onto the bed.

"Let's see what we're dealing with here…" He lifted the remains of her skirt. Trailing her hands up her thighs, he commented, "Nice… nice…" those hands found the frilly panties she wore, "Seriously? Wow, I _have_ to break you now!"

Carly sobbed into the sheets as he ripped the dress up further, "Well now, let's check to see how ready you are, shall we?" His probing fingers found her insides. He laughed, "That's just like a virgin, cry when you want something real bad. Feel how wet you are!"

Carly squeaked as his sudden motions startled her.

"You ought to be thanking me," He unbuckled, "I mean, you're so ready…"  
"For Freddie," she whispered. Silence, then he growled at her.

"What did you say?!"

Carly found her feet and backed away from Griffin, "I said I was ready for Freddie! You know what I realized? I don't know exactly what I want, but there's only one boy who was willing to wait for me to _be _ready! And you," She accused, "Who do you think you are? Freddie spent _years_ on me, warming me up to him, being kind, and being **thoughtful**!"

Griffin laughed, "Yeah… and look what it got him. He's dead or dying, and you're here to sex me."

The rumble of a motorcycle attracted Griffin's attention, "What the- ah!" The door exploded on him as his motorcycle collided with the wood. He was crushed.

Panting, bleeding, Freddie got off the bike, "Carly, are you okay?"

Weeping, she ran to his arms for comfort. Griffin had lied and manipulated her the whole time. Freddie, though at fault for almost everything, had been there for her.

"Let's get you out of here," Freddie stroked her hair. He put his coat around her and walked her, gentleman like, to her door.

"Freddie," He ignored her, and opened the door to his apartment. She followed him in.

"I know," He murmured. The boy took off his shirt.

He was pretty banged up.

"I love you," Carly waited for him to reply.

"Carly… you're confused right now, you don't know-hmmm…" She cut him off with a kiss. Taking off his coat, she explained.

"I've known what I've wanted for some time. Now, I respect that you may no longer want me, but let me tell you something, Freddie Benson; there is no one I want more than you, and nothing I want more than for you to take me to your bed, and have your way with me!"

He grew tense, "Once I get started… it'll hurt, and I won't stop."

She nodded. He picked her up and deposited her on his bed.


	12. Chapter 11 Finale

Chapter Twenty-one: Shameless

Freddie undressed coolly. Carly's heart pounded in her chest. How could he remain so in control? She felt like she was having a panic attack. Shifting up, she brought his face to her chest, where he kissed her. The straps from her bra fell down as her inhibitions.

His mouth latched onto her. She gasped, and removed her bra. Freddie attacked, and grew more and more satisfied with each pass.

His anger manifested. This was all her fault; she could have done so many things for him in the past. She could have become his actual girlfriend, or admitted to her feelings, or at least give him a chance. He, in this intimate time, took out his rage on her soft body. She took as much pain as she could as he molested her mounds.

He growled; the wolf was loose. Clawed hands ripped down her sides to her panties. The gentle swirl of lace and ruffles felt so foreign to him. There were so soft…

Carly felt herself exposed. She took a breath as Freddie's course skin found her. She took a breath.

"AH!" Her heart pounded from pain and fear, "ah, ah, Freddie, I- ah!"

He was merciless. The boy was gone, replaced almost solely by the animal. She understood now. The sweet little loser who loved her had been replaced by a beast. In some form, she felt justified. Yes, she blamed herself for losing him, but going through this somehow made them even, made it better.

Freddie was in pain as well. Part of him was crying; tears and saliva dripped from him onto the naked body of his love. But a much stronger part of him demanded more. She deserved this, wanted this, and wanted him! The pain from his wounds egged him on, not slowed him. Blood seeped out from his body onto hers, mixing with the lost liquid between her legs.

Carly was screaming from the assault. The bed rocked again and again. It felt like hours before he finally groaned and collapsed. For a moment, she thought he was dead.

Then a hand found that spot on her neck. Underneath the _unbelievable_ **pain**, her Freddie gave her some comfort. She groaned and leaned onto it. The two stayed this was for quite some time.

"Freddie," Carly whispered finally, "I love you."

He squeezed her tightly. He needed her so, so much, and did not know what to do with himself if he lost her.

Groaning, she shifted under him. Her nerves were alive, sending mixed signals; warmth, cold, pain… and pleasure. Freddie brought his head up to look into his lover's eyes for a few moments before pecking her lips. It was like their first real kiss. Which lead to a second and a third.

He got up, groaning from the pain, "I love you, Carly."

Freddie knew he had to leave now. The FBI the Institute- who knew who else would hunt him? But he had to leave now.

He looked back at the girl he had ruined feeling such sorrow, such remorse… He leaned in again and kissed her.

This time, she rolled him over. Though inexperienced, some part of her knew what to do. Her hips ground out a beat on him. Carly started to understand those songs, what they meant, and the emotion they tried to capture. Freddie groaned underneath her as she sped up.

Both were sore from the day's events, but both wanted to keep going. Finally, Carly finished and collapsed on her lover.

"Freddie," She panted out, "How about one more time?"

The end

Author's Notes. I don't own ICarly. Yes, I know, I'm shamelessly using these characters for sex. However, it _is _hurt/comfort!


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